Wednesday, January 04, 2006

Never Bring a Knife to a Gunfight...

...and never shoot pool with a man that owns his own cue.

Perhaps David Letterman can learn to not debate a professional news analysis and pundit.

Now, I'm not a Factoroid. I periodically tune in to the Radio Factor or the O'Reilly Factor. Among the pundits out there, I find he's fairer than most--when he's not talking about Roman Catholicism. Then, it's another story...

But I digress. I bring all this up because I hadn't thought to blog about Bill O'Reilly and his curious encounter with the would-be king of night-shows. With all due respect to A Certain Slant of Light, for whom I owe a hat tip for this story, this wasn't my thing.

Then I saw the video. (windows version). Afterward, I read the remainder of the transcript, including this ingenius display of Entertainment intellectual acumen:
Letterman: “I’m not smart enough to debate you point to point on this, but I have the feeling, I have the feeling about 60 percent of what you say is crap. [audience laughter] But I don’t know that for a fact. [more audience applause]

Paul Shafer: “60 percent.”

Letterman: “60 percent. I'm just spit-balling here.”

O’Reilly: “Listen, I respect your opinion. You should respect mine.”

Letterman: “Well, ah, I, okay. But I think you’re-”

O’Reilly: “Our analysis is based on the best evidence we can get.”

Letterman: “Yeah, but I think there’s something, this fair and balanced. I'm not sure that it's, I don't think that you represent an objective viewpoint.”

O’Reilly: “Well, you’re going to have to give me an example if you're going to make those claims.”

Letterman: “Well I don’t watch your show so that would be impossible.”

O’Reilly: “Then why would you come to that conclusion if you don't watch the program?”

Letterman: “Because of things that I’ve read, things that I know.”

O’Reilly: “Oh come on, you're going to take things that you've read. You know what say about you?”
All I can say to Mr. Letterman is: try not to draw a butterknife on a gunfighter like Bill. You might live longer. Not to mention get less embarrassed on National TV.

Mr. Letterman's sad grand-standing demonstrates just how out-of-touch our Reasonable entertainers have become. Since when do we pay them for their political opinions, btw? Sure, some may live and die by the profound wisdom of Camaron Diaz, but I'd rather subscribe to the Shut Up and Sing school?

If I want their opinions, I'll give them to them!

We should all take the time to laugh Letterman off his stage until he comes back prepared to truly entertain us. Trying to out-O'Reilly O'Reilly just doesn't cut it.